Ronnie's Home

I am so happy! Ronnie came home last night from being at training for two weeks. The boys and I were finishing up a late dinner when we heard the door open. Hayden runs with a "daddy, daddy!!!" Wyatt was in the high chair getting cleaned up when he hands me his plate and milk with a "da, da, da!" I wasn't expecting Wyatt to indulge in the excitement too. I forget that he isn't a baby and is getting big. Hayden and Wyatt will always be my babies.
Ronnie skipped dinner and we went to get ice cream and a movie for Ronnie and I for later. We ate our ice cream at home and the boys were a mess. Wyatt ate up his cone within 5-7 minutes, I swear. Hayden was lovin' his ice cream also.
Afterwards, we put on some Kaye West and had a dance fest! Wyatt is a little dancer! He waves his hands in the air and another move he puts his hands behind him as he leans forward - he looks like a skier without poles. I couldn't stop laughing. Both my camera and camcorder were dead, bummer but I am certain I couldn't forget.
After Ronnie and I tag teamed putting the boys to bed, we watched the last episode in the first season of "LOST." Yes, don't make fun of us, we are only about to start the second season. We'll catch up! All you LOST fans out there - keep your mouth shut! lol What a perfect evening. I am always missing my Ronnie when he is gone, but the reunion is always memorable for me and my boys.

My Beautiful Weekend

June 19, 2008

I had a very eventful Saturday. I attended a baptism for Michal, daughter of a great couple (Rachel & Dylan). Ronnie is out at South Carolina for training, so I brought my mom with to lighten my load and then I could enjoy my self a little more. The baptism was so personal. There were bag pipes, an african american gospel singer (excellent voice!), and Rachel's uncle "John the Baptist" an Indian man with a sweet heart. During the "ceremony," the parents and godparents took their shoes off and rolled their pants to proceed into the water. Hayden unstrapped his sandles and went in also. It was actually cute, but he was also off to the side, so he didn't interupt. It was awesome. Then we all gathered at their house after for great food and company. I will be doing that with the next child. I would love to make it more about celebrating and welcomining my child into the world of God rather than going to a church service and having a 5 minute honor. It just never occured to me to do something, so unique.

The boys were off to my parents' house. Which is always bittersweet. Then I headed to my friend, Tina's house for the Annual Post 4th of July Party. It was so fun, and just when I could put my feet up, AJ called with news of her labor proceeding. I was so excited. AJ had wanted me to come and videotape the birth and just make me a part of her family's experience. What an honor! But the call was just a warning call, but think she knew she was going to have the baby. As of the 8:45pm call, AJ had contractions for four hours. I was thinking that there had to be no way those would stop. I didn't get a call after that, but I did go home in case the baby did come anyway.

June 20, 2008,

So, I left Roberts, WI at 12:30am and got home about 1am or so. I called Ronnie to say good night and turned on TV to start going to sleep. Just as my eyes began to close, my cell phone rings. It is Bill! They both were at the hospital and the baby was coming fast! Oh crap! I got to Unity Hospital in Fridley in about 15 minutes! I made time, I think! I checked in with the security guard and went up to the nurse's station. They told me to wait in the waiting room because AJ was getting her epidural. 5 minutes goes by....10 minutes go by.....17 minutes go by...no one came. I got up to let them know that AJ wanted me there to videotape and to make sure she still wanted me there. She did! When I get into the room, AJ was already pushing. My mind was going a million miles a minute. I grabbed the camera from poor Bill and motioned to him to focus on AJ. I apologized to AJ and told her I was in the waiting room. AJ and Bill make such a great birthing team. They are just such a great couple and can feed off each other. I was blessed to see such a personal experience of them. AJ was in such great spirits and her excitement was overwhelming. She was great! She kept pushing, pushing, pushing and it wasn't progressing as much as AJ expected. She was getting exhausted and I just wanted to pat the top of her head and let her know it was ok. The nurse noticed that AJ held alot of tension in her legs and mention to grab those legs and focus on using only her vaginal muscles (can I say that word on here? ha-ha) The baby girl was out with two pushes! Amazing! AJ is so appreciative of her babies. She was going on about how happy her little one was here. The little girl cried, but seized when she heard AJ's voice. I wanted to cry. Everything was beautiful! Bill also could talk to the baby and she could recognize his voice. I could just feel the energy in the room. AJ turned to Bill after a nurse asked what her name was going to be. Bill answered AJ with, "Jacklyn." AJ looked at their baby and disagreed. They decided on

Laila Beth Heer

born July 20, 2008

at 2:28 am

7 lbs. 1 oz.

20 inches

Congratulations to the Heer family for their perfect bundle of joy! Thank you for making me a part of this great experience. I will never forget the day that Laila Beth came in this world. I will go to may parents' house to add pictures of her. But Laila looks like her older sister Delaney, but has her even bigger sister Cecelia's big beautiful eyes.

What?!!!! NO MORE Simon Delivers!!!!

Yes...it is true Simon Delivers is going out of business!!!! URGH! In case you are unaware of the miracle of Simon Delivers, it was a grocery store and etc. that delivered for a small fee. I sure would pay more, if it kept them in business. My whole balance of life is gone! I sound super dramatic right now, but it was a heaven sent for me. It was soooooo nice to do my bulk of grocery shopping with them, so I wouldn't have to lug around two little ones or make arrangements to go it alone. It gave me more time to have fun and not feel like I shop all the time, especially with the daycare. I wish there was something I could do to change their minds. If you are looking for a business opportunity....start a grocery delivery business! Mmmmmm.........

Yael Naim

I am always looking for ways to learn and grow. The song that I have on my profile is so beautiful. I fell in love with Yael Naim's voice and the music, but I didn't know what it meant. So, with my 7 years of French and a little help from the internet, I realize the song has great lyrics also. It shows that no matter how far you try to get away, you can't escape what is in your heart. Beautiful Song! Yael Naim has some English songs also if you are interested. Here is the English Translation of the song:

Paris by Yael Naim

I fled to a different place
So quickly
The farthest away and I succeeded
I am in Paris
Lit candles
Gray and foggy
I am happy and it's good for me
And it's so good for me
In Paris

I wander around ...
In enchanting narrow alleys
I am spellbound
It sucks me in
I am
In Paris
Beautiful buildings
They are old
And so very noble
But the country lights me up
In Paris

Mmm...
Fair from my house in Paris

I came here
A bit disenchanted
This beautiful illusion of mine
A trial to catch up with myself in Paris
Again I disappear
A sad dream
I am famous already
And they hear me here
In Paris

Now your voice
It whispers to me from far away
I miss you
Come return to me
Already from Paris
I miss you
I miss you
I miss you
I miss you
And...Paris.

Mmm...
Far from my love in Paris

The country is so good to me here
So why do I cry and get upset?

Yes, I am happy
So why do I cry at night

I miss you...from Paris
Mmm...

The sun wakes me up
From the window
And I feel the warmth a little more already
Mmm...
The plane lands
And there aren't any
Lush and trickling clouds
I'm back again
Shalom Paris

What Clare Means.....

Clare
You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily.You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind.A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable.You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

Dear Benson....

Dear Bryan,
Hey there friend! It has been three years now. Three years?! It is funny...we have known each other since junior high and I never would have though how much you have or will impact my life. It makes me laugh that you "allowed me" to be your friend, since I was Sara's cousin. You really let me in when the love of my life was deployed to Iraq and you helped me. You told me how much Ronnie loved and thought about me because that is how you felt about being away from your wife when your were deployed. You stayed together for two tours to Iraq and Afghanistan. You really cared and I needed that. Since then, you were a great friend and I will never forget your friendship.
I am sad. I am sad that you are not here to be goofy and make everyone laugh. I am sad that you can't be here to give it to me straight. I miss you and Ronnie showing off your ugly BC (birth control) glasses. I am sad that you can't be there to see mine and Ronnie's boys grow up or even your own children that you didn't have. I am sad that whenever someone mentions your name that a million emotions run through my mind....sadness, guilt, confusion, anger, disappointment, and even sometimes happiness, joy and laughter of times when we were all together. I wish that I knew. I wish anyone knew how much pain you were in. I wish I would have asked one question, "Is everything ok?" Maybe it would have helped....maybe it wouldn't have.
Today we had a Texas Hold'em poker tournament in your honor. You always were great at that game and loved playing with all the people in your life. My -hopefully- sister in law, Tina took 3rd place, Bryan Shattuck took 2nd place, and (I think) your cousin's wife, Sara took 1st. It was great, really great, to talk to friends and your family about you. It is all we have. We all lean on each other to better understand the terrible tragedy of not having you around. Next week, your wife Maria and her team, are in a bike race to raise money for S.A.V.E. (Suicide Awareness Voices of Education). I am so proud of her and how strong she is. I admire her so much and love that she has the strength to accomplish such an event.
Everyday, I wish you wouldn't have made such an extreme and permanent decision. I do know that you are now pain free and in a world where life is simple and happy. It will be a long time until our paths will meet again, but I am sure I will NEVER forget you. I hope that Ronnie and I will make you proud. Even, in some way, I hope you can live through us and the people who love you, because your life just wasn't long enough. Not nearly long enough.
Thank you for being such a great friend and you are missed and always will be missed. Especially, when we experience anything you would have loved.


Sincerely,
Clare

***Please click on the above S.A.V.E. to read more information on Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and to donate money to raise awareness. Thank You.

Houston, We have take off!

Here you go!!!! I am at my parents house-who has fast internet-and I am able to get a photo up! Whoooo Hooooo! Here, now you know we exist ha-ha

This picture is from our family trip to my cousin's lake home this past week (refer to previous posting)

I hope everyone had as much fun as we did during this holiday.

Our Fourth of July Vacation

We had a wonderful 4th of July holiday. Ronnie and I decided that Independence Day is a favorite. It is the one holiday you get to be outside and relax. The morning of 4Th of July, we went to North Saint Anthony Park to watch the parade and then walk it over to the park after for a picnic. After, we went to my aunt Kathy and Cindy's house. It is always a great time. My cousin's kids were there, so that was fun that Hayden had someone to run around with. We had such a wonderful day.
Saturday we headed to my Cousin's lake home in Exeland, WI. It is a beautiful home. It is in a very secluded area, which makes it very peaceful and it is on the lake, which is beautiful. I have to be honest, it is crazy bringing two young kids to a strange place with "nothing" to do. The boys don't sleep in as well and they have to be watched, so they don't get into anything. They don't have a beach at the lake, so that made it hard, but they had a beautiful deck that we could put a kiddy pool on. That was fun for the boys. We also managed to find a beach nearby, so that was exciting to see the boys run around in the water. It was the first time Wyatt was in a lake. Wyatt enjoyed it very much. We also found a cute zoo type park for the kids. It was amazing. There were several kinds of animals there to look at and then there were deer, peacocks and baby goats wondering the park. It was a great thing for our family to do together. It is so nice when we can do activities as a family, because with Ronnie's work schedule, it doesn't happen as often as we'd like. We came home Wednesday afternoon and enjoyed a perfect evening. We cooked dinner and then headed to Dairy Queen. A personal family tradition of mine. Then we grabbed a movie at blockbuster. It is so great to be home and even though the vacation wasn't completely relaxing, it sure made me appreciate coming home.